i sit

i have managed to break my own heart, pulled it right out of my chest and threw it on the floor
i sit here shattered and lonely.
always so afraid to love and once i find someone worthy i let my mind take over my heart
i sit here in a pool of regret.
once again a foolish heart and once again i did this to myself.
i ache from the pit of my soul.
if i had done things differently... i did do things differently and this is what got me here right now with this pain in my chest
i sit here .
changing my patterns has me stuck between a rock and a hard place
i sit here stuck... on you
truth is i never wanted to leave your place
i sit surrounded by you.
being with you made me feel most safe
i sit in the safety of you.
when you told me you doubted your ability to love i looked for the next exit
i didnt want to love someone that couldnt love me... again
i sit here hurt.
i have been here before, the loveless lover that cant stop loving
i sit here loving... you
i thought someone else would eliminate the heartbreak before it happened and
i sit here broken.
i thought you were perfect. you are in my eyes.
waiting for you to come back to me.
i sit here.. waiting... for you